How Frog by Beau Smith
I must say and much as desire to move forward in courage, there are times when fear of the unknown and not producing an acceptable result tend to hold me back. I don’t know if I’ve come to feel that no matter what, I’ll miss the mark, I’m too lazy to do the hard work or I’ve lost confidence in the things that I use to look up to. No matter what the source, there’s a sense of disillusionment that surrounds me when I expect life to be about so much more than I actually find there. For this reason, I’ve found that it’s a good idea to base your life on things that undeniably true and to embrace relationships that are whole and healthy. Now these things are not as easily done as they are set on the horizon. The reality of this was made so amazingly clear by a young lady I met in the singles department back at First Baptist Church of Atlanta on the return trip back from white water rafting. I was driving the bus an stirring conversation as I do so well and the subject turned philosophic which for us was the subject of dating and interpersonal relationships with those of an opposite gender.
Some will seek to find someone to date that follows a particular system of belief or way of life. In this pattern of practice many young and mature singles will arrive at a place of worship called church where other single people dwell in large groups. The statement my friend Melissa made to me was, “Just because a boy sits on a pew doesn’t mean that he’s good.” I don’t think she couldn’t have reached me with any clearer statement of the gospel than what she said that day. Is it not true that there are lots of jacked up people sitting in aisles or padded chairs with their arms raised seeking to honor God. Just because they look pretty and smile at you doesn’t mean they are living in holy conformity to the teachings of the scriptures. In fact, I’ve found that there are many great people who live closely to the scriptures in some areas than those in the church. Melissa’s experience dating guys that participate in church was less than she expected and she had learned that it’s takes one-on-one experience to really know who a person is.
And the fact is there are some great people out there. One of the most valuable person you can meet is someone who appreciates you for who you are and believes in you and the dreams you have for yourself. Now, you need to be careful about who you let into your life because as care and consideration develop amongst people the habits and practices of that person can been traded into your life, some of those are good and some are well unneeded hindrances. I once had a couple of roommates who were obsessive TV watchers and they had the biggest TVs around with surround sound and everything. Here I was with a 13” TV that I’d had from my college days. TV really wasn’t part of my life and I didn’t spend much time watching it. Those guys moved out and I found myself compelled to buy a large rear projection TV for ministry purposes of course. And, I ordered cable. What was I thinking? I’d picked up their passion for movies, where I was a cultural anorexic prior to those experiences.
It takes some energy to believe the best about someone but it’s so worth it. When you find that kind of person you should invest because they are rare. For sometime now, I’ve had this large pile of clutter on my desk and a valuable and quite lovely supporter came over to help me get a few things straighten out. I’d let things go and she could tell, but she didn’t criticize, she connected and let me know she too had struggled with these things. She looked around and grabbed a calendar and started giving me some practical advice and wrote down a few deadlines and actually put them on the calendar. Then in conversation she looked me in the eye and said she knew what I was capable of and really meant it. If she’d been putting me on, I’d have known it, my BS detector is pretty good. This simple experience was powerful and it moved me way past a few of the fears of clutter and disorganization, which are not part of the FrogShway.
As a result of her generosity and many others. I’d sitting at a lovely wooden desk donated by Lisa and Jack Moore of Atlanta that is free of clutter and well-organized. You can see the top and only the necessary things are on it. The filing system is started and there’s only one small pile left on the floor. That interaction and some time at my creative support group on Monday nights down at TULA ignited me to complete some other unfinished projects. Things are slowly starting to come together and it was because someone really believed in me at my point of need and I trusted a few people to be completely transparent with my struggles. The collateral effect on lives around me is big too, but that’s for another post. Just think if I was a poet or a songwriter or a blogger. That one person would have affected countless thousands of people by one sincere act of love.
I say all this to let you know that when you dig down deep to the well of sincerity and look for the best in people it can have a catalytic revolutionary effect on the world around you. It’s simple and starts with the power of one life. This type of practice is the every nucleus of the essence that makes FrogShwayness the kind of thing that people wear around on recycled eco-friendly t-shirts. So the next time you see someone, say hello, smile and look into his or her eyes and really mean it. Most unquestionably, you’ll add value to their life and spark something good.
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I would argue that there are many ways to share spark with others. You can see the God in everyone, and do little short things to encourage. Or you can see that something you want to encourage in a smaller number of people, and spend more time and effort with that smaller sub-group. I think both efforts are valid, though I imagine that there is more of a positive feedback loop with the second approach.